Patience Makwele
When Fiona, an inmate at the Windhoek Correctional Facility, realised she was pregnant at 17, fear set in.
Months passed before her body showed signs of pregnancy.
When she told the man she believed was responsible, he denied it and cut off contact.
“I had missed my period for two months. But it didn’t click at first that I was pregnant because it was not something new; I always missed my periods for longer than five months.”
“He blocked me everywhere; told me if I ever called him, he would make my life a living hell and he wanted nothing to do with me,” she said. “That’s when I got even more scared.”
Afraid of how her family would react, Fiona kept the pregnancy to herself. She left home, saying she was going to look for work and moved in with a friend in Windhoek.
“I did not know how I was going to tell anyone, let alone my parents, because they are too strict and I was the first teen to fall pregnant while still in school in the family. So I just kept quiet,” Fiona told Young Observer.
Fiona did not go for medical check-ups. One night, she woke up in pain.
“The contractions started in the evening, but around midnight, close to 01h30, they became stronger and unbearable; that’s when I knew it was time,” she said.
She left the house and went to a bushy area.
“I did not want anyone to hear me. I was scared,” she narrates.
Two hours later, Fiona gave birth alone.
“I did not know what I was doing. I was just trying to get through it,” she said.
She lost consciousness at one point. When she woke up, she pushed again.
“The baby came out, but it was not crying,” she said.
She said panic took over.
“I did not have a phone. I did not know who to call. The only thing in my mind was that if I asked for help, I would get in trouble.”
Fiona said she had to make a difficult decision she now lives with.
“I wrapped the baby in a black plastic bag and buried the baby in a shallow grave with stones,” she said.
The next day, dogs discovered the body. She was arrested.
Now in her thirties, Fiona is serving a 15-year prison sentence. She said the emotional impact remains.
“It does not go away. You think about it all the time.”
She said she writes letters to cope.
“When it becomes too much, I write letters of apologies to the baby and ask for forgiveness. In my journal the baby has three names and carries my surname. Sometimes I sing. Sometimes I pray and ask God for forgiveness.”
Her story reflects cases social workers say they often see.
Windhoek-based former DREAMS social worker Martha Ndapandula Linus said fear and isolation play a role.
“Young girls often hide their pregnancies and do not seek help until it is too late due to the fear of being judged,” she said.
She said poverty, stigma and lack of support make the situation harder, especially when partners are absent.
“Young women feel like they have no safe space to turn to,” she said. “That’s when panic decisions happen.”
Linus said more support systems are needed beyond social media campaigns.
“By the time a young woman is in that situation, a lot has already gone wrong,” she said.
Namibia continues to record high numbers of unplanned pregnancies among young people.
Some cases end in unsafe outcomes. Health officials say unsafe abortion remains a concern, with complications still reported in public health facilities.
The government and civil society groups have introduced programmes to address the issue.
The Ministry of Gender Equality, Poverty Eradication and Child Welfare is working to strengthen child protection and support services.
Youth programmes such as the #BeFree Youth Campus Initiative provide access to counselling and reproductive health services.
Some organisations have introduced baby saver boxes, which allow mothers to safely and anonymously surrender newborns.
The Ruach Elohim Foundation in Swakopmund has cared for more than 85 infants since 2018, including 49 received through its baby saver box.
Ruach Elohim Foundation founder Ronel Peters said the aim is to provide a safe option.
“That box is there so that no baby has to be left in a dangerous situation,” she said.
Fiona said she only learnt about baby saver boxes while in prison.
“If I knew about it, my baby would still be alive. I would have taken the baby there and he would have been saved; the foundation would have given him a new home and I would have been at peace knowing my baby is alive and healthy with a family who accepts him like he was their own.”
She said more awareness is needed.
“Not everyone knows these things exist,” she said. “People need to talk about it more; therefore, I am calling on the ministry of gender to work hand in hand with these people and spread the word so that others, especially those in rural areas, can know about this. The government needs to spread the word using radios, social media and other means of campaigns to raise awareness.”
Fiona said she has met other women in prison with similar experiences.
“Just like me, a lot of women inside the prison made decisions out of fear. Now they are living with it.”
Fiona’s said she hopes to help others when she leaves prison.
“I was young, I was scared, and I didn’t think clearly. But if someone else can learn from my story, then maybe something good can come from it.”
*Fiona’s name has been changed to protect her identity.
